When I think about one of the biggest ways that my family has saved money in our grocery bill the last few years, I think about all the times we did NOT buy an item because it just wasn’t a good enough deal. We simply do without. Sounds drastic and depressing. But I don’t see it that way. Let me explain. . .
You only have a certain budget for food for the month. As a consumer you get to decide how that gets spent. Just as with anything when there is a limited supply (time, money, energy) you have to prioritize how to use or spend it, right? This is a personal decision, the priorities will be different in every family.
When I decided to stay home with my kids, it meant cutting our income by 60%. That’s right, 60 percent. Take $100 and throw $60 of it out the window. What was once $100, is now $40 at the grocery store. I wouldn’t change it for a second. I wouldn’t trade anything for those extra 60 dollars, but I will be picky in how I spend what I have left.
For us, this means – if it’s not on sale and/or we don’t have a coupon – we generally don’t buy it. It’s that simple. If it’s not a loss leader in the grocery ad (one of the best of the best deals), we will generally wait, and do without, until it does go on super sale.
A good example for us is apples. Our whole family loves apples. Each one of us would easily eat one a day, if we have them – but I prefer to buy organic apples (again, a personal decision) and if I can’t find them for under $1 a pound, we just do without. We buy bananas instead. Or we eat whatever fruit IS on sale that week. And you know what? We live.
Or another example is coffee creamer. Oh how I prefer my morning coffee with a little creamer. But my coffee doesn’t taste nearly as sweet when I know I spent $4 on my bottle of creamer, when I could have waited and paid $1 or $2 or even gotten for FREE. So I’m drinking black coffee this week. And you know what? I live. And I do so gratefully.
There will be weeks when we don’t have peanut butter, or we’re out of bread, or we don’t have cheese (gasp!). But instead we’ll make homemade rolls or pick up other dairy products on sale. We still manage to eat balanced, healthy diets with the foods that ARE on sale. We are flexible and I believe this really helps us be frugal.
Now I’m not saying you should only live on bread and water. Vegetables, fruit, dairy – you should still be stocking up on the staples of a well-balanced diet, but I’m just suggesting you re-assess what’s a necessity and or a need versus a want. Just because you LOVE Yoplait brand yogurt, for example, doesn’t mean that for a couple week’s you can’t use the store brand variety, until another big sale comes along on Yoplait, or whatever you favorite thing is.
Eventually everything goes on sale. We don’t do without forever. 🙂 Most everything we want or need goes on super sale at least every few months. And we stock up when it does! For most products, they will reach a rock-bottom price about once every 12 weeks (or three months). If you’re family can’t live without it – stock up when it’s on super sale, enough to last you a few months or so.
As your stockpile of staple items grows, it’s easier to do without. Some weeks I just don’t shop, except for produce. By having a stockpile of pasta, rice, bread (in the freezer), canned tomatoes, homemade freezer meals – whatever we have on hand – we make due. And we’re fine with that. My three-year-old son already knows that if it’s not on sale, we generally don’t get it and it’s the only way he’s ever known – so frankly it doesn’t seem to phase him (that doesn’t mean he doesn’t ask!). I’m not neglecting my kids because I won’t buy the fancy cereals or the brand name fruit snacks or fancy candies. Believe me, he does just fine.
You could get this, or you could get that. A $3 bag of chips for example. Not on sale. No coupon. Personally? I’d rather spend $3 on apples or $3 on meat. It’s a constant juggling act of prioritization and thoughtful consumerism. What it’s not? Going to the grocery store and picking up a little bit of everything. That gets expensive fast.
Just prioritize. It’s that simple.
With all this said, do I buy full-priced items? Yes. I will. If you see me at the store will you see splurges in my cart? Yes, you probably will. But I’m strategic about it. I will buy a $5 gallon of organic milk because organic milk is one of those areas I splurge. Organic pasta? Potato chips? Not so much. We make sacrifices in some areas, so we can splurge in others. We decide what things are really important to us and what things we can waiver on. Again, personal choice and thoughtful consumerism.
Treat yourself, it’s hard work saving money! I will be the first person to tell you that if you save $5 on your grocery bill with coupons, that you should be able to walk over to Starbucks and buy a $4 latte – and not feel guilty about it. I won’t judge you for your purchases and I hope people would never judge me for mine – it’s a personal decision. I’m just saying, be strategic about it. Reassess your “needs” and focus on being flexible. And sometimes do without. You’ll find that by doing without, you actually end up with more in the long run.
Tell me, are there certain things you won’t go without? What items are splurges for you?
One thing you don’t have to do without? Queen Bee Coupons! Come on over to my Facebook page (we have a lot of fun over there) or sign up for my daily newsletter, and follow me on Twitter! Thanks you for your visit!
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this makes no sense
” I will be the first person to tell you that if you save $5 on your grocery bill with coupons, that you should be able to walk over to Starbucks and buy a $4 latte – and not feel guilty about it.”
So your family can’t have apples that they LOVE because they are $1.99/lb but you say it’s ok to spend $4 on a coffee drink??? Even though a pound of coffee beans costs $4 and would make dozens of cups of coffee?
You “go without” and drink your coffee black because you don’t have creamer because it wasn’t on sale? Why not put some of that organic milk in there? Buy a bottle of flavored syrup for $2 that will last month and months and months and you won’t need that artificial creamer at all.
This is great! I love your point about thoughtful consumerism. There are things that I won’t settle on- organic milk is one of those things for me too! But I’ve given up buy most junk food- it’s terrible for you and kills your budget. It’s hard work though, isn’t it?!?
Do you organize your “stockpile” in any way? I think mine needs it but I’m not sure how to go about it.
Thank you for sharing this information with all of us! We cut our income by half when I decided to stay home with our children, and I made it my job to save our family as much money as possible on the things we need.
On a weekly basis, I make sure to stock up on the necessities first, and then with the remainder of my budget I pick up snacks or stockpile items. My husband gets upset that we don’t always have Doritos in the house any more, but I can’t justify $3.99 bag or even the “sale price” of $3.50, and only buy them when they drop to $2.50 a bag or less.
By using coupons I have been able to continue buying name brands, and even reintroduce organic and all natural products into our diet that I thought we would have to do without on a limited budget.
I’m lucky to live in an area where all the grocery stores double coupons and it is a bit of a grocery store Mecca around here (15 big name stores all within a 15 min drive), so that does make things easier. However, I do get funny looks from people, at certain grocery stores, for walking the aisles with my coupon binder & calculator, but I know my money is just as good as theirs, & it will just go a whole lot farther!
Thanks for this post! its fantastic and so encouraging im in the same boat when i quit work to be with the kids. my oldest is 5 and hes told my mom the other day “we dont get it if its not on sale and mommy doesnt have a coupon!” 🙂 but i still feel like i always have to tell the kids no not today ;(
I’m so glad that you mention splurges like organic apples and organic milk. I have to confess I did this method that you suggest for years but without proper education about the products I was purchasing. I regret buying items that were not the healthiest for my family (items with lots of pesticides, processed foods, chemically-laden laundry and dishwasher soaps) but were on sale and I had a coupon for them. I’ve educated myself now and I’m a much better consumer. The bottom line is no longer just price but smart, healthy purchases (and maybe now I find myself doing without even more until I can purchase what I feel is the best choice for my family). If only I had known some of this info. about foods and cleaning products 10-15 years ago.
I have been doing this for quite sometime, I think I remember learning to shop with coupons from my mom when I was a kid…
she came from a family of 9 siblings plus my grandparents… so it was instilled in me to not waste food… or anything else for that matter… I guess I just figured that everyone shopped with a shopping list and coupons… to this day I try to spend wisely… thank goodness I have been trained so well, as I have not been able to find work in over 2 years, and my husband is on social security disability… but we always have good food on the table, and I am never ashamed to tell people that if I did not use all the coupons and shop the sales wisely like I do that I would not be able to do this…
I love this. I have trained myself to be the same way. I am the opposite of a lot of frugal families out there. My family hardly ever used coupons, sure we bought more of something if it was on sale, but my mom never thought twice about buying something full price if she wanted it. We shopped, we spent, we felt we had the money to do so. Yeah well – debt piled up. I’m sure there’s a lot of families like us out there. Once I moved in with my now fiance, we saw how hard it was to live off of what we were making and live the same lifestyle I had been living with my parents. I got myself into a pretty good amount of debt by the time I turned 19 years old and at 24 I’m still working on paying it off. My mentality is 100% different and I hope to teach my own children (whenever they may come into my life) my new way of living. I love it. We still worry about money on occasion, but feeling the load of debt slowly come off my shoulders is a great feeling and when it’s gone I never want it back! I don’t care how many Coach purses or pairs of shoes I have to skip buying! 🙂
There are definitely times we go without because we eat mostly organic, natural foods now and I try to stock up when they’re on sale. When I first got out of college, however, my eating habits weren’t quite so pure and money was veeeery tight. My lunch almost every day at work was ramen noodles(bought at no more than 10 cents each), an apple and a Coke – I just had to draw the line somewhere, and generic soda was my line. Now it’s organic milk, ah, how things have changed. 🙂
I love this article, I have been trying to figure out a cheap way to have coffee creamer all the time. I found that evaporated milk works really well, if you have a sweet tooth, you can try sweeten condensed milk.
I never even considered just not buying something, I know that’s ridiculous. I am going to try to follow your lead!
Thanks for sharing, I am still building and fine tuning my stock pile, it means that sometimes we run out of certain items and can’t replace them for a week or two.
One of the coolest things about frugal grocery shopping is how much variety in your diet you get buying only what is on sale. One week it is broccoli, the next it is green beans, or brussel sprouts. So much fun!
Saw this on MSM. Such a great article! This is my motto, but I really needed this encouragement this week!!!
I love it! My style exactly. Plus, once the item does come available for a great price and you get restocked, it feels like such a treat. 🙂
Thanks for your great article. I heard you will be in West Olympia for MOPS. We are looking forward to it! I thought I’d let you know since we love apples like you…Gala apples are 59 cents a pound at Jay’s Farm Stand and I got some “mature” strawberries for 99 cents a pound today.
Very Well Said.
Very Well Said!
Very well written!
I used to live in another country for 5 years as a missionary. I did without a lot of things both because of cost and availability. I enjoyed trying to make do and using what fresh produce was on sale.
Now that I am back in the states I still try to do this. This way I will be ready to go back overseas as God leads!
I love this article! This is exactly how I live & what I try to do. It may drive my husband a little bit nuts when I have to go out to CVS at 9:00 p.m. on Sunday night because I have a coupon that’s expiring that night and there’s a great deal on something… but that’s how I save us money that allows me to stay home and still have everything we need! Thanks for putting into words what many of us do but may not be able to explain so gracefully.
I have been practicing this for awhile now as well. I have also realized that in some cases I can make things from scratch at home that I used to buy at the store. For example, last week in one day I needed pizza sauce and taco sauce for two different recipes I was preparing. I searched online and found recipes for both of these that were made with tomato paste that I had in the pantry. Both of these turned out good or better than what I would have purchased. My recipes for the day were made and I saved a trip to the store, saving money and gas. When I went to the store for my one trip later in the week, I made sure to buy more tomato paste for the next time I need it in a pinch.
I had to do the same thing for enchilada sauce, not only was making it myself WAY cheaper it tasted better, too. 😀
Love this! Thank you. Often, some in my family feel a sense of humiliation because we are not able to pick up whatever we want and put it in the cart. But to me, it is a blessing to be able to have what we do. It makes us more creative, stronger, closer, etc… This article is an encouragement and a good reminder that doing without is ok.
It’s a great way to try new things, too- different brands, different meat cuts, ect.. and sometimes you find some really great finds.
jen
Thank you so much for this post! I find it encouraging that there are others who have this view. My son too, knows to ask “is this on sale?” or “do we have a coupon for this?”. If the answer is No, he accepts that and continues to enjoy what he does have. I began making better financial choices out of necessity, but I know now that the impact I’ve made on his mindset far outweighs any THING we could have. If we were to wake up tomorrow as millionaires, I’d still only allow treats that are bought with a coupon. 😉
My splurge is Diet Dew..Im a dewaholic and so yes I splurge but I do as often as possible try to stock up when they are marked down to dollar or under for 2 liters!
I stopped working in 2007 after having my now almost 4 year old daughter. To say it’s been a struggle full of sacrifice is an understatement, but I wouldn’t trade it! I’ve just started couponing in the last 6 months and don’t know how we made it before. A whole new world has opened to me! It’s nice to have confirmation that I don’t HAVE to buy everything offered in a store. It really is ok to not have an apple available 365 days a year! Now rather than rewarding myself with whatever sweet I splurged on, I come home and pour over my receipt and I have a circle of friends I can brag to, who are also on a couponing journey. That kind of high tastes better to me than any high priced cookie.:)
The one name brand item I won’t do without? Ziploc bags.
One thing we usually dont do without is soda. My husband is addicted to it (better than alcohol), but I will wait till I find a really good sale (between 2.00 and 2.50 a 12pk) and stock up. I have had it stacked in the dining room 6 high and 6 wide before which we have dubbed the wall of pop. But it lasts until the next sale. I will never pay full price, sometimes 4.50 here.
Excellent advice. I still remember explaining to my then 3-year-old daughter that even though the mini oreos in individual packages were really nifty (that girl loves Oreos) they just weren’t in our budget which then was $18,000/year for our family of 4. She’s 15 now and an excellent bargain shopper. Full Price are rarely heard in our vocabulary.
great article! I too try to shop only sales and with coupons, but I know I could improve.
one thing my mom taught me is to shop only sales/clearance racks at department stores. It’s kind of funny because at times, the rest of the store doesn’t even exist in our eyes. LOL
We have a very limited grocery budget and we do without often. My husband knows that if he’s sees a steak in the freezer it’s always going to the “manager’s special” and all three of us will eat off that one steak (in stir fry or fajitas, etc.) But there are things I do splurge on…there is a certain brand of baby carrots that I buy because they just taste SO much better. Sure, I could get a bag for $.99 but we won’t eat them. So I pay $1.88 and they get eaten.
I’m curious–what is this tasty brand of carrots that you like?
Thanks for this. I totally could have written it almost word for word! I have people all the time asking how I make our VERY LIMITED budget stretch..but when I start telling them how–such as giving up things, they completely tune out. It is a sacrifice but you get used to it and eat something else instead and move on. I plan our meals creatively (and splurge every once in a while) so that my family doesn’t really miss things for the most part.
I grew up in a very frugal household. I am the oldest of five kids and we were always a single income family. I don’t think I really realized that the way we lived was so rare until I was an adult. While I still have a lot to learn I am so thankful that my mom taught me to be frugal minded. I think it comes more naturally to me than to most because of my upbringing.
Great post. The part I love the most is that you stopped working and cut your income by 60%. That is where I am, the main contributer to the income so to see others have done it and survived, give me hope!! Thanks
Here’s the link from my blog.
http://www.reallifedeals.com/?p=160
Thanks for the tips. With my husbands work cut in half over a year ago and a decision to have a baby who is now 8 months old the budget is tight. After a year of couponing I could not go back to my old ways. Just today I got a weeks of groceries for $37.00 and saved $56.00. With that I got the great Kohls coupon for $10.00 off 1 item and my neighbor gave me her’s. So I was able to get 2 free pairs of pjs for my son today. Also I am in Camas, WA but we have a great produce store in our town. They try to get as much local and organic produce for cheap prices. I came out this week with 1 1/2 shopping bags of produce for $8.00. Without this store my family would not be eating the amount of produce we do eat. Thanks for the great tips.
Love the post!
I used to splurge on hand soap from Bath & Body Works for my kitchen. I knew I could buy handsoap so much cheaper anywhere else but with the frequent handwashing I do, the smells made me so happy! I always bought a stockpile in Jan and during their summer sale so never paid the outrageous full-price. I have since gotten over my obsession…
To other commenters~ Thanks for the ‘rain check tip’ and the apple tip. I always wonder what happens to all that produce.
Excellent post! Thank you. Even read it to my husband and he enjoyed it!
You said this so well. I’ve been trying to tell folks my overall spending philosophy and now I can just tell them “what she said.”
As far as my splurging, I was telling a friend what I put in my freezer after the Safeway $5 off $15 sale. I bought an inordinate amount of frozen hash browns. Now, I know full well that I can make my own for a fraction of the cost, but my food processor and/or grater grate them too small and they turn out mushy. With four kids ages 4, 3, 2, and almost 1, it’s fine by me to have an easy breakfast from time to time. Plus, my husband likes to cook them! I’ll probably wait until next March to buy more now that I know I can get them for so little.
Areas where I save substantially: homemade laundry detergent, cooking from scratch (90% of the time), and following my detailed only-what-is-on-sale-plus-a-coupon list – no impulse buys!
Areas where I regularly splurge: agave syrup in my coffee instead of sugar or flavored creamer (I have hypoglycemia and it helps keep my blood sugar relatively steady), $20 haircuts every 4 months, and whole bean coffee from Costco (preferably never more than $4/lb).
How do you make homemade laundry detergent?
Homemade laundry detergent is great! And a huge money saver! Check out this recipe on “18 Kids and Counting” http://www.duggarfamily.com/recipes.html Also white vinegar instead of fabric softener works so well.
I, too, love saving money with the homemade laundry detergent. In January, I calculated how much it cost me to make. A batch will fill three 100 oz. Tide bottles … Tide (w/out sale or coupons) at Walmart is $11.99 per bottle … homemade … $.58 per bottle! that is a 95% savings!
The Duggar recipe is amazing! There’s just two of us in my house, so I made a half batch of the liquid almost a year ago and we still have a few jugs left. I already have the supplies needed to make another batch because I had leftovers from my purchase the first go round…. this means for about $10 I can wash my families clothes for a little less than 3 years.
That being said, while the clothes are definitely clean, they have no scent…. so we splurge when it comes to fabric softener (which is generally cheaper than the detergent) so our clothes smell nice and flowery.
The Duggar recipe didn’t work so well for us. We have really hard water. I found a different recipe that is
1/3 bar of fels naptha
1/2 C each of washing soda and borax
Makes 2 gallons and seems to work better for us. We’ve been using this for 3 yrs. and is extremely cheap. Even with coupons, I can’t get the special soap I have to use for what I can make this for. For those with allergies, this could be the answer for you. The Duggar recipe is more cost effective, but, the recipe I use is 1 1/2 cents per load. Just another thought on the subject.
Thanks for this post! This is a common sense idea but I really needed the reminder! We have lots of food issues which makes our grocery bill climb, but I think the biggest factor in a high grocery bill at our house can be habit–we bought it last week so into the cart it goes! Thanks for your insightful posts!
Love the raincheck idea! I accidentally fell into that situation myself and discovered how great it is to get a sale raincheck to use later. Make sure you note how long the raincheck is good for at each store. Some are 30 days, some longer.
Heather, an idea for apples: if you have any small organic/health stores, ask them if they give away or discount the culled apples. Those are the slightly bruised or cut apples that the workers need to cull out of the display every day (NO ONE will buy even slightly damaged apples, and they make the others go bad). I used to work at a store here in Seattle, and we kept the culled apples in the walk-in cooler and just gave them away. Many are fine for fresh eating, or at least for applesauce or drying in the dehydrator. Make sure to keep them refrigerated at home until you use them. I never buy apples!
I just started couponing in February and I have learned SO MUCH from you and other local bloggers. My family is getting used to “doing without” – a totally new concept. No cereal? I have a million bagels in the deep freeze and a ton of oatmeal. No cold cuts? I cooked extra dinner meat to slice for sandwiches.
I also make my own yogurt. Most times I can find dairy yogurt super-cheap, but I am allergic so I have to have that coconut milk type of yogurt that is SO EXPENSIVE. I just buy one cup of it (vanilla or plain) and use it as starter to make my own yogurt. A yogurt maker is like $20-25 on Amazon ( I have the Euro Cuisine one) and it takes 5 minutes to get it mixed up and in the maker in the morning. If you have milk allergies, ask for one for your birthday!!
Can I ask, how do you get homemade coconut milk yogurt to set?! I’ve tried over and over, as we also avoid dairy and have tried unsuccessfully to make coconut milk yogurt at home. I finally gave up and now buy the cultured coconut milk (essentially keifer) which I can stretch further.
I have started doing this and coupling and catalinas… and doing without. I stopped working in July 2010 and I haven’t completing gotten a handle on all the saving and doing without yet. We have made significant changes and we are eating from our stockpile and freezer meals for these two weeks. Just milk and produce at the store this payday. I had to get out of the habit of replenishing items that were half gone as well. For instance: I might only have a half of gallon of milk left (there’s only 3 of us), and when I was working I’d rush out and buy a gallon even if that meant a non-planned trip to the grocery store which resulted in a lot of unnecessary splurge purchases (including toys and books bought due to guilt of not spending time with my daughter) or even convenience store milk at double the prices of grocery stores…. but now… I just restructure our meals to involve meals without milk use. I try to make the milk last until the next planned shopping trip. I consider it a challenge. So, while I don’t have all figured out yet, I am making positive steps towards a reduction in my grocery footprint. Also, I’ve noticed that we can live on less food than what we were buying…. we love a lunch of apples, cheese and crackers now… or grapes, or oranges…. and it is just as refreshing as the big meals that would end up with too many leftovers and waste. Thanks for your site and posts. Very helpful to this queenbee want-a-bee…. tee hee!
Great article! Speaking of coffee creamer..did you sign up for the free coupon from Vocal Point? I just signed up this week. 🙂
Great article! I love the concept of conscious spending. With 3 kids, I can honestly say that they know that we never buy something that’s not on sale. Even when we go in to a GoodWill or a Yardsale my kids will remind me “I know Mom, we don’t buy a toy unless its a good toy at a good price!”. By teaching them to not spend on somethings we are able to have the money for other items. I plan to link back from my blog in the morning! Thanks! I’ll send you the link just so you can see what I write about your article 🙂
Being thrifty, just wanted to add that you can make your own potato chips at home. I have a mandoline that I use, but you can just slice them with a knife, too. I’ve done sweet potatoes, yams, and rutabagas at this point. They’re so good, I’ve wondered why I ever bought them at the store. Everything you said in your article is so true. Thanks for putting it into print…will have to pass on to my grown kids.
if you have a food processor a lot of times they come with a slicer blade too which works well!
Can you share how to make these? I tried once, but failed. Would love to know how! 🙂
Cynthia: WOW. Fantastic idea!
Heather-love the website and advice-Thank you!
I do the same thing. I don’t think ever really end up doing without. At least it doesn’t feel like it because I do so much stockpiling and rainchecking.
i.e. A store had organic apples (two varities) on sale for .88/# a few weeks ago. I went the last day of the sale and got a raincheck for each variety. I took hubby with me and had him get his own raincheck. Now in the weeks since. I’ve gone in and used two of those rainchecks but each time I’ve bought over 20# of apples.
If a store offers rainchecks I’ll always try to go on the last day of the sale, late in the day, and get rainchecks for the items that are on sale. That gives me time to stockpile stuff without busting my grocery budget.
We have no choice but to eat 95%+ organic due to allergic issues. I have to be smart how I spend my money and I shop online before I go. I check all the stores (Whole Foods, local independents, etc.) and make my list of loss leaders for each store before I head out.
I have a hybrid so I can do this w/o wasting a lot of money on gas and my kids are in elementary school now so I have all the time in the world.
I’m a huge fan of rainchecks, too, and I usually shop the last day of the sale as well. There’s many times when there’s great deals in the ads, but I don’t necessarily need the items and would rather use my grocery budget towards something else that we need so I get really excited when they’re out of something and I can get a rain check for it instead. They don’t expire for a month so that gives me a little time to wait until we need it or I have more wiggle room in the budget and I still get the best price.
We do without a lot of things, but I haven’t given up scented fabric softener. Not because it’s necessary to the laundry, but because my family enjoys nice smelling clothes and linens. We also always buy coffee creamer, but in comparison – I used to drink TWO starbucks beverages a day!
Thanks for sharing this perspective. Love your blog!
Thank you for sharing. I love hearing from other people about what’s important to them. The beauty is – we get to decide. Cutting back on two Starbucks drinks a day to creamer is a great example of doing without and saving money! Thanks again for sharing. 🙂
I found a working espresso machine at Habitat for Humanity for $3. I pretty much only get Starbucks when I’m on the road now. 🙂
I hear you about the creamer.
When it hits a good price, stock up: it freezes very well 🙂
this is excellent advice – we have done this for years and still do it . The kids are grown and they turned out beautifully- and I have no regrets for staying home with them — thanks for some great common sense advice!!!